I learned something new in school today.
Teacher in hall: "Yeah, but he still believes Pluto exists."
Me: "I don't get it."
Teacher: "Pluto's not a planet anymore."
Me: "Says who?"
Teacher: "You haven't heard that?"
Me: "Who gets to decide that all of a sudden there's no Pluto? How can there be no Pluto? I didn't see any emails about that. Who's in charge of that stuff?"
Teacher: "Well you'll love this - there's a fifth ocean."
Teacher: "Yeah, the Southern Ocean."
Me: "Man, I'm writing a letter. Who do I address it to? United Textbook Makers of America?"