Where I’ve been
The Unraveling

Gym Confessions

  • I’ve been hiding in the locker room writing on the cement benches after my workouts because I wasn’t sure if it was okay to leave my kids in the daycare if I wasn’t working out. (Because, God forbid I get in “trouble.”) The confession: I think I’ll keep doing it anyway because it’s quiet and I don’t care about looking “weird.”

  • I always weigh in right after my work out so that even if the number hasn’t changed I’m feeling good. The Confession: I always start at my highest weight nine weeks ago (pregnancies aside) so I keep focused on the long-term gains loss instead of hyper-focusing on whether or not I’ve lost a fraction of a pound in 22 hours.

  • I’m really at the gym for the shower and a few off-mama-duty moments to write. My goal is to work out enough to “deserve” a shower and I always have some work-related thing I’m mentally dealing, kind of like when people go to sleep with a question on their mind intending to wake up with the answer. I never work out without my water bottle and mini-Moleskine. Until yesterday when I ended up writing on my hands, the back of Prevention magazine and on two subscription card inserts. I never cut my hair so short that I can't stick my pen in ponytail - the notes have to be transcribed stat since they are barely legible when I'm toward the middle to end of the EFX/treadmill work outs. The Confession: I lost my notebook. Searched the house and car for it and nearly passed out when I saw it on Norm’s desk at the gym. Ohhh, damn. I opened it to a random page and read:

“Was he your boyfriend?”

“Oh, no we were just friends. I didn’t even sleep with him or anything.”

Except there weren’t quotation marks because I know this is a conversation between my characters. Norm, however, doesn’t.

  • I work out in the gym’s geriatric ward because the people are nicer and I feel comfortable practicing my running. They work out to Tony Bennett and don’t like my music. It’s their room. So I use my iPod and listen to my more modern music. The Confession: this includes the soundtrack to Top Gun, New Kids on the Block, Julio Iglesias, and St. Elmo’s Fire. I used to listen to Eminem until I realized listening to misogynistic music because “I like the beat” is like reading Hustler “for the articles.”
  • Going to the gym has become a habit in the nine weeks I’ve been going four times a week. The Confession: I love it.