I am having a bit of a personality conflict with … my job.
When it comes to being a Reporter Mama, it seems I lean harder in the direction of Reporter than Mama, as that is the nature of the job. As much as my employer tries to accommodate the schedule, things must be covered when they’re happening, not next week.
As of late it’s been consuming me from the inside out and I feel like I’m not getting up for air often enough, which could explain the crushing anxiety in my chest.
That is compounded by the fact that my five-year-old son just exploded into being a person with a schedule of his own but no means of transportation … so things are going full throttle and while I sincerely love my job and being the mom of a fresh-faced Kindergartener and soccer player … so fun … I am missing doing the things that make me feel like just me – personal writing being at the top of that list. Also, showering. Just kidding, I’m still showering but not really lingering over the loofah. Just moving on to the next thing as quickly as possible.
Working on figuring that it out now that I’ve identified it’s not a passing sense of being overwhelmed but rather how my life is right now. Praying on this and finding interesting things coming up as I work through it.
One of the awesome things coming out of this phase is Matt took on a lot of the soccer business. Which I write more about in my recent column:
The last time I came up for air – actually it was called insomnia, I tamed the racing thoughts by making my first, ever digital scrapbook pages. I was inspired to tell the story of being surprised by Jakey Cake’s fancy footwork (and head-butting) on the sidelines … I didn’t even know he could kick the ball that well.
You can click on the individual images to read the journaling and see the pictures better.
And then I still couldn’t sleep so I worked on a page for Sam. I totally geeked out on the fact that I could make the paper match the clothes the kids were wearing by simply* using the eyedropper tool.
*I won’t focus on how long it took me to get to simple.
*Yes I am aware of the editing errors, but I saved it and can’t figure out how to edit a layer once it’s saved. Instead of giving it another few hours of my life I am stamping it with the “good enough” seal and moving on … speaking of which, on to my next meeting.
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