Nathalie's Notes

Crazy Lucy

Riley and Zoe, picked this little shirt out for Lucy Baby last Christmas. As I fought with her to put it on, I overheard Matt mutter to his brother-in-law, "Well, Nathalie and I used to have a dog. Now Nathalie has a dog."

Consumer Equality

Soon after finding out I was pregnant, Matt's parents were up for a visit and we wound up at the outlet stores in Lincoln City. My mother-in-law shopped with me for maternity clothes, which I have to admit I was pretty much ready for by the time I was 8 weeks pregnant. Oh, hell, honestly some of them would've been nice to have before I was pregnant! Matt and his dad had finally had enough waiting and came to drag us out of the store.

Is there a store for expecting fathers? His mom asked.

Yeah. The liquor store. Was Matt's instant reply. His quick wit is one of my favorite things about him.

Down at the Walgreens

Sure swimming is good for my brain and my body but my favorite part is the things I observe and overhear in the locker room. And since these days it takes me twice as long to do anything, I am really getting some good eavesdropping done. The time of day that I go puts me in the locker room right in between the end of Geriatric Aerobics and the start of Kids Day Camp. It's fun to watch the Betty and Ednas give way to the Brittnea and Emmas of today. The older women seem to have nothing but time and a sense of appreciation for their bodies. The younger girls are in a rush to get to the next thing and are so self-conscious it almost makes me cringe with my own memories of being that age. Me, I'm just enjoying being in the middle. Which makes me wonder when exactly is one considered "middle-aged?" One thing I'm not at all angsty about it my age. So far the constant in my life has been each year improving on the last.

So, the other day, I'm towel-drying my hair and listening to this conversation:

"I hate the ones with clouds."

"Yes, clouds are boring. Flowers are bad too."

"Would you be interested in trading?"

"Wellllll ... do you do the 500 piece or the 1,000?"

"Oh I have some of both. Right now I'm really into the circle ones. You can get those down at the Walgreens. They're all the same size."

Google Machine

I don't know if this will come across as funny as it did on the radio but I have to share it  just in case. I heard this bit on the radio yesterday that still has me laughing out loud. I came by 101.5 KFLY out of Corvallis, something called the Donkey Show, and they were playing snippets of an interview/shouting match between Sean Hannity and Al Sharpton. Sharpton was getting ticked that Hannity was coming up with bits of his history that supposedly weren't accurate and angrily spit out: "What? Where did you get that? Off your ... your Google Machine?!" 

Isn't it Ironic?

Maybe I've already done this one, but found this scrap of paper and had to share (again?).

I'm at the library. In the quiet, no cell phone zone, perusing the new book selection. This woman beside me is prattling on to her friend on her cell phone. I try to ignore her until she says in an annoyed voice to her friend:

"Hello! Presence of mind! Awareness of where you're at!"

At which point I gave her "You are one of the stupid people they warned me about" look.

Signs of mental illness

So this was a little weird. Matt and I are sitting on our "stoop" eating our Matt-made ginormous sandwiches when we hear shuffling gravel. A shrinking old woman appears through the hedges. It is hot. She is wearing heavy black trousers, a white wool sweater and heels. She is carrying a purse in one hand and clutching a cigarette pouch, lighter and white wool blanket in the other.

"Where ist das funf street?" She asks in a thick German accent. Um. She whips a folded newspaper out of her purse and waves it at us. She explain in mixed German and English that she is looking for a garage sale and has been walking and walking and can't find the house. And now, she pants, she just needs to "sitzen." And promptly parks herself on a stack of bricks beside me. Um.

"Mochten sie eine tasse wasser?" I stammer, is it der, die, das? I don't know but it's hot, surely she needs some water. She answers without noticing that I was speaking to her in her native language at her random stop in Carlton. This is odd to me. I mean, it's not the only thing that's strange in this little scenario, but still. And then, typical European, she takes the glass of water to be polite but never takes a sip. (well, how many Europeans do you know that drink water?)

Okay, so I'm thinking signs of mental illness here include the blanket and the wool sweater on a hot, hot day. Also the garage sale she was walking all over town to find advertised only one thing for sale: a ping pong table.

What was she going to do with it? Hump it on her back?

Overheard

Matt and I talking about what we're doing for Spring Break, and how it's the opposite of a nice vacation, yet it's awesome to have time to catch up on stuff. I told Matt I was a little concerened that he was going a mile a minute and not relaxing at all. In true Capricorn style he replied:

It's relaxing to get a bunch of shit done.