Isn't it odd how someone can be an intense part of your life and then fade somewhere into the recesses of your mind only to be brought back alive by some random trigger? I haven't thought about an old friend, well I guess an ex-boyfriend, in years but was reminded of him as I flipped through an old journal tonight looking for material for an essay I'm working on. It's not that I've forgotten K. exactly, I just don't ever think about him, so to see all these details come back, things written at the time of dating him ... for a moment it was the late 90s again and I was in Bellingham just moving into my first apartment. Then, in a later journal, I found these notes:
K. wasn't like a boyfriend you imagine. In a sense he was, he was romantic, but it seemed so staged. Still, we did fun shit together. Why do I remember myself in a business suit with him? I'd just dropped out of school and was doing Mary Kay. God. That's not a fun flashback. I remember hiking up at Baker, tripping at the beach, checking out my first apartment, and him feeling ... well, not feeling because K. didn't feel. He was just so logical about everything. I knew when I saw it that it was my apartment. And I realized I didn't have to do it his way. He wasn't my boyfriend. Not really. Because I loved B. So I can’t blame K. for what happened next – I never have- that’s probably why we could go back to being really good friends so fast. Gloria Gaynor – the party – tripping together – Chuckanut. What brought it all up tonight is Niki saying “I wonder what his new wife is like?”
“Well – she gets her eyebrows and her nails done. Professionally. French manicure, nothing too bright. She wears khakis and sweater sets. She loves to cook, but not the meat. She enjoys hiking, but hates getting dirty, she’s into camping but can’t pitch a tent. Her name is like Meredith or Bonnie. Or Bethany. Probably Bethany."
“Are you just making this shit up?”
Me: "Well yeah, but you can see it, right?"