Sam takes a hostage
License to Lie

Observed at Wildwood

Note to self: Don't micro-manage God. I found this note to myself in an old journal this weekend. I love how old journals serve as a letter to my future, and in this case present, self. I'm working on a little project with my journals, which I'll announce soon. Meanwhile ... on the same excavating mission I came by this free-writing I did after observing a family eating breakfast at Wildwood.

At Wildwood this morning I saw a girl who looked like she was about 18 eating with whom appeared to be a younger sister and her dad. She ordered Earl Grey tea and dunked her bag while they were talking - like she was keeping her hands busy - like maybe she picked up smoking while away at college, and felt out of sorts with her family - a mixture of glad to see them but they were cramping her new style. All the boys in the dorm knew her by name, her dad observed out loud - her little sister giggled.

"Yeah, Katie's always been boy crazy."

"You should talk."

The younger one stared back blankly, widening her eyes though when Katie said casually she kept in touch with her best friend from high school, "Yeah, I hear her little brother has a new girlfriend." Katie said, glancing at her sister out of the corner of her eye, dunking the tea bag.

"Since when do you drink tea?" Little sister changed the subject. Katie shrugged.

"I bet you drink beer now too." Her little sister let her know the information exchange back home went both ways. But Katie just rolled her eyes, managing, as usual, to make her sister feel immature.

"Girls! Enough about beer and boys, how are your classes?" Dad asked signaling the waitress to bring more coffee. Katie rattled off evaluations of her various professors and the merits of each and as the, as far as she could tell, uselessness of math.

Not bad for not actually being able to hear what they saying. But just watching them brought this stuff out. Actually just the idea of how much you change while away at college and how some things can't. {change}

You can feel so grown up and then fall right into bickering with a sibling and pleading with parents and you would just die if any of your new friends who knew you as the cool jello shot girl at off-campus parties could see you now.